Tag: relationships

  • Rest up

    Rest up

    It’s Rest and nonrest

    According to research, the state of rest doesn’t occur from the activity itself, but rather from when there is harmony between our feelings, motivations, and actions. This harmony cultivates calm, confidence, and belonging. By contrast, the state of nonrest is defined by <dis>harmony of our feelings, motivations, and actions, which leads to tension and energy depletion.

    We are continuously moving between rest and nonrest. When we feel tense and fatigued, we should take it as a cue to restore harmony.

    Keys to foster rest

    We can cultivate harmony between our feelings, motivations, and actions by embracing the following concepts.

    Natural rhythms

    Align with the natural rhythms of the day, month, and season. For example, take a rest as you transition from one task to another in the day and honour how you feel in the winter versus the summer.

    Letting go

    You don’t have to do everything yourself. Trust and have confidence in others, allowing them to help you.

    Safe relationships

    Being accepted without judgment and not having to behave in a certain way is conducive to rest. Invest your time and effort into beneficial relationships and walk away from toxic ones.

    Pleasure and creativity

    Appreciate the beauty in nature, music, and art. Take the time to not only to take in and enjoy the beauty, but to also answer the call to create what you’re compelled to create.

    Feeling rested

    Mental-emotional health

    We feel mental fatigue after prolonged periods of cognitive activity. Mental fatigue is a psychobiological state involving cognitive decline, reduced accuracy, and slower reaction time. Symptoms may include temperamental depression, moodiness, and changeability, which may create relationship difficulties and challenges at work; it can sometimes lead to substance abuse.

    Rest Rx: Research shows that listening to music and binaural beats helps ease mental fatigue. Having a regular meditation practice may also reduce the negative effects of mental fatigue.

    Physical health

    When we’re physically fatigued, we can experience symptoms ranging from insomnia, chronic pain, digestive issues, heart conditions, and gynecological problems. While there isn’t a biological explanation for every physical symptom of fatigue, researchers have developed an umbrella term for exhaustion-related symptoms, called persistent physical symptoms (PPS).

    Rest Rx: Research shows that nonsleep deep rest (NSDR) improves physical readiness, exercise recovery, tension, emotional balance, negative affect, and overall stress. In this study, the NSDR was elicited by lying down on a mat in a dark, quiet room and doing 10 minutes of guided meditation exercises.

    By Cassie Irwin, ND

    Article Courtesy of Alive Magazine
  • Staying young with friends

    Staying young with friends

    Staying young with friends

    How social relationships can lead to better health outcomes

    An abundance of research indicates that the quality of our social relationships can play a critical role in our well-being as we age. The strength of our social ties may even have effects on our physical health, contributing to how well we age.

    Importance of meaningful relationships

    In an analysis of data from a longitudinal study, my colleagues and I found that individuals with greater social support and community cohesion experienced better mental health later in life, particularly amongst those who had had challenging childhoods.

    Among the resources examined, the quality, rather than the quantity, of these relationships was found to offset some of the negative experiences that participants had had in early life, leading to greater resilience and better mental health as they grew older.

    Functions of friendship

    A systematic review of adult friendship and well-being speaks to several important functions of close adult friendships, including three forms of social support:

    • Emotional support: friends offer acceptance, sympathy, love, and encouragement—a critical buffer against life’s stressors.
    • Instrumental support: friends may also provide practical help, such as financial assistance or help with daily tasks.
    • Informational support: friends share advice or guidance as a key function of friendship.

    And the six functional components that generally determine the quality of the relationship include the following:

    • Help, which includes the three aforementioned forms of social support.
    • Stimulating companionship, which involves participating in activities with another person.
    • Emotional security, in which close friends provide a sense of safety during new or challenging situations, thus reducing stress.
    • Reliable alliance, where trust and loyalty form the foundation of any deep friendship, making sure someone will always have your back.
    • Self-validation, where friends provide the reassurance and encouragement needed to maintain a positive self-image.
    • Intimacy, where the willingness to share personal thoughts and feelings builds a unique bond that is essential for emotional well-being.

    Health benefits of strong social relationships

    A recent study found that social isolation reduced physical activity levels in older adults, leading to diminished cognitive performance. This was especially evident in individuals over 65, with effects on memory and executive function. This research emphasizes that staying socially connected, either through direct interaction or through group activities, can significantly affect the physical and mental aspects of aging.

    Conversely, loneliness and social isolation have been linked to a higher risk of developing health issues such as cardiovascular disease, cognitive decline, and even premature mortality. Social isolation can reduce motivation for physical activity, and loneliness can increase stress levels, contributing to a range of health problems.

    Embrace and cultivate rich relationships

    Take this time to reflect on the people in your life. Which relationships bring you joy and fulfillment? Who can you reach out to today to make a positive connection? Whether it’s a close friend or a family member, deepening your social ties may bring health and happiness into your life.

    Healthy aging is more than a matter of diet and exercise—it’s also about keeping those rich relationships that help us bloom, even as we grow older.

    by Theodore D. Cosco, PhD (Cantab), CPsychol

    Article Courtesy of Alive Magazine

  • Bros need bros

    Bros need bros

    Bros need bros

    In-person relationships affect men’s mental and physical health

    When you were younger, you likely had more friends than you knew what to do with. Through school, sports, and clubs, you connected with people who shared your interests. It was easy—just show up.

    As life became more complex with careers, partners, kids, and more, you probably found yourself with just one or two close friends and rarely see them in person. Does it matter? Your mental and physical health may depend on those friendships.

    Benefits with friends

    Social connection serves as a buffer against stress, depression, and other mental health issues, correlating with a greater likelihood of seeking help.

    Thirty years ago, 55 percent of men had at least six close friends, but today, only about 27 percent report having that many, with 15 percent having no close friendships.

    When men do have friends, how do they “hang”?

    The American Journal of Men’s Health identifies three distinct patterns:

    1. Relationships with men are often “instrumental,” centered on shared activities, while those with women involve more personal sharing.
    2. Men typically find it challenging to confide in other men, often attributing emotional expression to femininity, which is often seen as undesirable in male groups.
    3. Many men take pride in being “independent” and reject the need for social support, preferring to handle difficulties alone.

    Social connection and health

    Strong social connections can insulate against loneliness, anxiety, and depression. They can also help maintain a healthy BMI, improve blood sugar control, and enhance cancer-fighting odds.

    Tim Geromini, nutrition and strength coach, states, “If you spend time with people who are physically active, you’re more likely to be fit. Social connectedness with the right people will positively impact your mental wellness and physical health.”

    Partner power

    If this resonates with someone you know, consider your role in empowering your partner. The “independent guy” might not ask for help even when he needs it.

    With connection benefiting health, consider this your green light. Here are a few tips from Geromini:

    Offer gentle encouragement

    Approach the topic with empathy and encourage open conversations about their social concerns.

    Lead by example

    Demonstrate the positive impact of social connections by actively engaging in your own social life, inspiring your partner to follow suit.

    Identify shared interests

    Participate in social activities together, like local classes or events you both enjoy.

    Support networking

    Accompany your partner to social or networking events, offering emotional support and encouragement.

    Act as a resource

    Help find resources and communities relevant to your partner’s interests, such as local groups and online communities.

    Encourage gradual exposure

    Promote small steps in building connections through casual gatherings or small group outings.

    Express unconditional support

    Maintain a nonjudgmental approach and assure your partner of your support.

    By Brendan Rofe, BA, DipA

    Article Courtesy of Alive Magazine

  • Nurture meaningful connections

    Nurture meaningful connections

    Nurture meaningful connections

    Find the way back to relationships

    Although the beginning of the pandemic may feel like a lifetime ago, the lessons we learned from that time are important to remember—namely the significance of collective resilience. Above all else, we acquired a deeper appreciation for nurturing connections, upholding the belief that being socially connected keeps us safer, healthier, and happier.

    Individual impacts

    There’s no doubt the pandemic made many of us a bit jumpy. Although we suffered collectively, the effects on various population groups have differed.

    “It’s important to acknowledge that people’s experiences of the pandemic had a lot to do with their life situation and the resources they had available to them, including the basics,” says David Gomes, life coach and mindfulness teacher. In general, women and parents experienced a heavier burden.

    Generation “this versus that”

    Like it or hate it, referring to different generations as X (born in the ’60s and ’70s), Y (millennials born in the ’80s and ’90s), and Z (post-millennials, born in 2000 and after) makes it easier to understand the impact of the global phenomenon that shook us all.

    Being able to navigate through the digital world with ease came in handy for the Y and Z generations, but it was hardly enough to make up for the loss of in-person socializing. Life milestones, such as graduation ceremonies, weddings, and celebrations of life, were put on hold.

    “Young people, especially, found themselves challenged by the pandemic, because it came at a time when they were stepping out into the world, having to find jobs and a way forward, which is something their parents didn’t have to contend with,” says Gomes.

    Screens to the rescue?

    It’s complicated. We know extensive use of screens is detrimental to our well-being. It can get in the way of being present; it can affect our sleep and shred our focus, which affects work productivity. But throw in a pandemic, and we’re suddenly relying on screens for most of our human interactions—from work and family online chats to dating and exercising.

    “Humans have always gathered around in a circle to tell stories, to celebrate, and to be with each other; it’s in our DNA,” says Gomes. The screens, love them or hate them, provided a relief from solitude during a time when we needed it the most.

    Mindfulness tools

    Life is the sum of many changes, most of which we have no control over—and the recent pandemic is proof of that. “Many of us don’t like change, so we try to keep things stable,” says Gomes.

    Developing coping skills, such as becoming mindful of transitions, can help reduce the anxiety often associated with life events, pandemic included.

    “Life is an endless series of transitions,” says Gomes. “[The pandemic] reminded us of the sacredness of being able to be outside and connecting with our fellow humans.”

    By Daniela Ginta, MSc, NNCP

    Article Courtesy of Alive Magazine